For those of us lucky enough to experience Lin-Manuel Miranda’s work of art that is Hamilton, we’re a special crowd. We care about cabinet battles, cry over the word “burn,” and you’ll always have a soft spot for Philip. You’re in a wonderful group of people who are too excited about rapping historical events. These are the ten duel commandments.
Stage 1: Someone says “You need to listen to Hamilton,” and they come off a little too strong. You think about it.
Stage 2: It’s late at night and you’re working on a paper and you decide to listen to it.
Stage 3: Next morning, you find yourself walking to class kind of humming it, liking Act 2, thinking of how clever it is.
Stage 4: You finally got through the entirety of the soundtrack and you’re ugly crying in the food court.
Stage 5: Friends don’t know where you are – you’re too busy being angry that you’ve reached the end of the Hamilton tag on Tumblr. It’s probably 2 a.m.
Stage 6: You break out into full song and dance in public until you’ve found someone to join in.
Stage 7: Hamilton puns have entered your daily dialogue and are wondering why no one else is laughing.
Stage 8: There are 20 Hamilton stickers in your shopping cart for your laptop, even though you don’t have anymore space.
Stage 9: You’ve quit cold turkey to try to get back to life back together and listen to the Top 50 Songs on Spotify.
Stage 10: The Hamilton Mixtape came out. We’re back in.
Alina Zerpa is a senior majoring in journalism and psychology, a major Oreo enthusiast and spends way too much time on Tumblr.